SOMEDAY WE WILL KNOW A LOVE THAT IS OUT OF THIS WORLD

Fiona: UHHHH, the internet says david duchovney is 50???
Sarah: I think that's right!!!???/
Fiona: i can't believe x-files started 17 years ago. also, why haven't i thought about searching for x files fanfic before?
Sarah: Probably something in your subconscious knew it would take over and ruin your life
Fiona: ahahaha ughhhh it couldn't be worse for me than twilight fanfic
Sarah: The year is 1944. A young soldier named fox mulder is headed to germany, but on the night before he ships out a prostitue named dana with a love of medical science captures his heart. They pledge that their love will survive the distance, but when dana is abducted by aliens, fox must risk it all, deserting the army to track her down.
Sarah: LITTLE DOES HE KNOW THE SAME GOVERNMENT THAT IS NOW AFTER HIM IS THE ONE RESPONSIBLE FOR DANA SCULLY'S DISAPPEARANCE.
Fiona: HAHAHAA
Fiona: dana scully is an ambitious young resident with no time for love. but when a handsome amnesiac in a red speedo whows up in her ER claiming to have been abducted by aliens, will she be able to figure out what really happened before her feelings for the stranger cloud her judgement? WILL SHE LEARN THE TRUTH ABOUT UFO'S...AND THE TRUTH ABOUT HER OWN HEART?
Sarah: Dana scully is a social worker with the dc foster care system. One of her clients, samantha, has just been kicked out of her third foster home for her persistent alien abduction claims. Now dana must track down samantha's older brother, fox, who samantha claims was abducted too, before the girl is admitted to a psychiatric ward. Will dana find fox? Will she discover a love that is truly OUT OF THIS WORLD? Or will she find both??? I think it's both.
Fiona: i just loled on the street like a crazy person at that out of this world line. SO GOOD.

This is my life, for real

Fiona: ps i bought prescription subglasses today. i understand if you have to move out because of the toolitude of the fact that they're tortoise shell rayban wayfarers
Sarah: def moving out
Fiona: shucks. i'll just have to fill your room with an rpattz shrine. "DON'T GO IN THERE. THAT DOOR IS LOCKED FOR A REASON."
Sarah: "THERE'S A ROSE, SLOWLY LOSING ITS PETALS. IF I DON'T FUCK RPATTZ BY DAWN ON MY 30TH BIRTHDAY I'M DESTINED TO NOT FUCK RPATTZ EVER"
Fiona: "SURRENDER TO THE RPATTZ OF THE NIIIIIGHT"

Oh hi, neglected blog!

Alanty: GUESS WHO HAS A NEW TEXTABLE PHOOOOONE!!!!!
Alanty: WEE OOH WEE OOH WAHOO YAHOO
Fiona: hahahaha woo! today i'm wearing a bright pink shirt and teal tights. WHOA HEY LOOK AT ME I AM A FASHION REBEL
Alanty: Ooh!! Sounds awes! I am wearing a black skirt and black tights for a meeting. Turns out the 10 lbs I have gained turned this into a BAD IDEA SKIRT
Fiona: hahaha nice. all of my clothes are bad idea clothes
Alanty: No way. You got cute clothes. In other news FUUUCK WORRRRRK
Fiona: haha AGREED. work blewwwwwwws - ed sullivan
Alanty: Hahaha "geef my ass a kees, work" -- topo gigio

More good stuff

Fiona: just saw a hilariously scrabbly puppy run around in a circle too fast, fall on its face and recover immediately. new spirit animal, yes/yes?

Mike: I'd say...Yes?!

Fiona: "i'd fight gandhi."

"...good answer."

Mike: Ah fight club. Many a young man's confusing introduction to testosterone.

Fiona: and the start of many a young girl's unsettling sexual attraction to sweaty blood-covered men.

Mike: I count on that daily.

Fiona: ah, new york: the city with no eye contact. it's good to be back.

Alanty: Hahaha. Dispatch from washington heights, capital of baffling street harassment: (man looks at me) damn, I paid 50 dollars too much! (???)

Fiona: dude, that liquid eyeliner is so choice. i'll never doubt your makeup recommendations again.

Ninty: Darn tootin! I love that eyeliner! Like a marker! The choice-iest! Lol

Fiona: it's so easy!

Ninty: Helllls yeah. Will make people believe we have ballin' makeup skills we dont' actually possess.

Fiona: PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE MAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN

Ninty: Ahahaha. YEAHHHHH SUNGLASSES

Ninty: I'm watching usa v. Algeria. SO EFFIN TENSE. lol

Fiona: OH MAN. they're screening it on the 11th floor with coffee and donuts but the hr guy i hate is there so i don't wanna go

Ninty: If he leaves, YOU GOTTA CHECK IT lol.

Fiona: i watched the game from minute 68 on! I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT SHIT! those algerian rogues with their nonstop fouls. also 91st minute goal! fucking AMAAAAAAAZING

Ninty: SERIOUSLY. total insanity! Pure american balls made that possible. EAT IT, ALGERIA.

Fiona: AHAHAH i just emailed your text to my coworkers who were also watching cause it was so awes.

Marge: WOOOOO!!!! Eclipse viewing with Alana and Sarah etc?? It's supposed to be horrible but we can ogle some sweet vampire action.

Fiona: oh my god yes let's! not to get your hopes up but there is a refreshing amount of plot in eclipse!

Marge: FUCK YEAH! But I was looking forward to that camera circling thingy where nothing happens for 4 months. Should I read the book first? Cuz I'll do it, I will!

Fiona: ahahaa cinematic genius. i don't think it's necessary, it's not like you'd be like "the book was way better" but it wouldn't take you very long should you choose to do so

Marge: I think I had better. I might not understand the complexities of the relationships otherwise, which would be devastating. WOOOO I say!!

Fiona: it's very hard to follow. easy to confuse the brooding with the glowering and the glittering with the sparkling. "wait, which one is like a russet adonis and which one is like a marble tribute to a forgotten god of beauty?"

Marge: AHAHAHAHA. I tried to read your text aloud to Alana but was laughing so hard I hadda just show it to her and now she is too.

Fiona: also that dude with the cut lip: fiiiiiiine!

Ninty: I KNOW. I had my eye on him the whole game. Also: jozy altidore. FIIIIINE. And two months younger than me! I feel so unaccomplished!

Fiona: we can't all be sexy soccah playahs, some of us just gotta be playahs reg-steez

Ninty: Ahaha indeed!

HNNNNNNG

Fiona: hoo boy, there's nothing more disgusting first thing in the morning than a commute that's heavily scented of human dook

Alanty: OH JESUSSSSS. People in other cities might ask how we know it's human dook. Then we would laff knowingly.

Fiona: hahahaha

Fiona: i feel like i can still smell it. i'm concerned that i absorbed some of the smell

Alanty: Also funny bc last night I dreamed -- and Marge helped me realize that poop in my dreams is most often a symbol of psychic residue of emotional "shit" being processed and dealt with -- so I dreamed you clogged the terlet with this HUGE ENTIRE-INTESTINE SHAPED poo, which was so dense and impacted I had to chop it up and plunge it down. I think it's about you going to therapy n shit.

Fiona: ahahahahaha! my dream self and psychic shit apologize for clogging your mind-toilet

Alanty: Omg the mind-toilet made me die laffing on the street. Also don't worry, you didn't absorb the smell. You are just olfactorily traumatized and experiencing post dook traumatic stress

Fiona: post-dookmatic stress disodor!

Alanty: AHAHAHAHA YOU ARE A JEENYUS

Fiona: goin on the blerg lol

Alanty: Hahahahaha how could it not: it's about poop!

moar texts

Fiona: i love how hr keeps sending out all these weight watchers at work emails but not a one about quitting smoking
Sarah: thats so fucked. still think you should sue
Fiona: lol
Fiona: [employer] now hiring, fatties need not apply


Sarah: i am the worst ever, but could you clean litter pan for me tonight? i am getting home real late and i noticed this morning it is way ripe
Fiona: no problem
Sarah: carlo and i thank you
Fiona: i noticed it was a bit stank this morning too. to dos for this evening: psychiatrist, laundry, cat box, try to avoid hyperventilating over rpattz hair, continue not having sex
Sarah: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA


Sarah: ugh. waiting at a bar and waitress making small talk. cant handle it. LOVE DRINKING ALONE THOUGH
Fiona: lol lol. just listened to a long conversation about rent control and jail and classic cars and oil spill. ah, the shrink waiting room at a mental health slash substance abuse program


Fiona: am waiting to see shrink. hnnnnnnnnnng crazy people.
Alanty: Haha YIPES THEY SCARE ME
Fiona: seriously. i'm like "uh, why were you in jail for the last 49 days? i mean, i guess i can watch your walking stick/branch and plastic bag full of grocery circulars and other plastic bags while you disappear for 20 minutes."
Alanty: Eeeeeeek!!!! Your shrink must be grateful for normies like you!
Fiona: i like to think so!
Alanty: Youuuuu know it! You should get the non-scary patient discount


Fiona: ps [coworker] gem from last friday i forgot to tell you about: "you know, 'raw bar' is almost a palindrome...though i guess with palindromes 'almost' doesn't count"
Sarah: awesome
Alanty: Juahahahahahahahahahahahah
Alanty: You shoulda given him the old mr walsh-ism: "close only counts in horse shoes and hand grenades."
Fiona: oh man. i am totally saying that all the time from now on
Alanty: Haha mr. Walsh ruled. I hope he's happy wherever he is, and safe from that psycho death threater!

I spent the whole train ride wondering why I was the only one with an idiotic grin on my face

Fiona: I JUST RODE THE R TRAIN WITH CHRIS NOTH

Riley: Omg i am sooooooooo jealous, gimme some of that!

Alanty: HO SHITTTTT!!

Mom: OMG!

Anna: AWESOME!!!!!!

Mike: Holy eff! Do you feel any different?

Sarah: why was chris noth on the subway???

Kaitlin: WHAT

Street harassment and books, just another day

Sarah: a new one: "mis, miss you dropped something." (sarah looks around confused) "miss, you dropped my heart." that doesn't even make sense!

Fiona: WHAT THE FUCK. "miss, miss! you dropped a deuce on my heart!"

Fiona: ps steven lent me up in the air (the book). whyyyyy, i just wanna finish readin rebecca and not have his dumb book kicking around forevs

Sarah: oh GOD. does he just have the worst most conventional taste every??? also, next halloween i wanna be mrs. danvers

Fiona: ugh yes. also, that is totally an awesome costume idea. fuck. i might steal that.

Fiona: also we should have a halloween party next year. or go to one. as mrs. danvers and the ghost of rebecca. carlo can be jasper.

Sarah: if you want i'll be rebecca and you can just be totally gay for me

Fiona: OH THE LATE MRS. DE WINTER ALWAYS WAS FOND OF SAUCES

Fiona: ps steven lent me up in the air (the book). whyyyyy, i just wanna finish readin rebecca and not have his dumb book kicking around forevs

Alanty: Hahahahahaha as midnight oil said (paraphrase) you gotta give it baaaaaack. How can we sleep when our books are returning?

Fiona: hahaha, i love that song

This is really what our lives are like

Sarah: oh p.s. im vit d deficient too. HEALTH PROBLEM TWINS!

Fiona: oh fyi for vit d deficiency. my vitamin d level was like SHOCKINGLY low when they tested me for it the first time, so i imagine the doc told you to take supplements but just fyi i take 400 iu vitamin d in the morning, and then 1 calcium supplement with 400 iu vit d each at lunch and dinner, and that works really well and my levels are way way higher. so yeah. i am at like senior citizen level of daily supplements and pills.

Sarah: she told me what to take but i forget. will compare with you at home like bored widows

Fiona: hahaaha our lives rule. "marilyn manson's music really speaks to me. how much vitamin d do you take to keep your bones from turning into dust?"

Sarah: HAHAHAHAHA

TRIUMPHANT RETURN

Alanty: more like DUMP DAY AMIRITE

Fiona: lol srsly. also fyi the rpattz interview kinda sucked! like it was funny but same old boring questions with just a few gems here and there. the jimmy fallon interview was way better actually

Alanty: your own encyclopedic knowledge of rpattz ruined the interview for you!! it's like when aron watches animated shows and can't enjoy them cuz he knows too much about what good animation is

Fiona: hahaha yeah my rpattz thing is definitely a problem in that way AND NO OTHER!!!

Fiona: man i wish i'd listened to bikini kill in high school. i would've been apeshit over this

Sarah: dude, that's why when i met k hanna i was super embarrassing and gushy. cuz it srsly CHANGED MY LIFE

Fiona: amaaaaazing

Sarah: p.s. i still listen to rebel grrl all the time

Fiona: that song is so effing good

Fiona: I WASN'T BORN WITH ENOUGH MIDDLE FINGERS

Sarah: glad you're enjoying my adolescence

Fiona: this is so much fun. i wish i had listened to such awesome stuff in high school. i need to find someone who has a coal chamber cd i can borrow. CHAGRIN

Sarah: dude. not even i liked coal chamber....(says the girl with two staind cds)

Fiona: hahahahaha oh god. it was ninth grade, ok? i was 14 and had a terrible influence for a best friend. also i had to take what i could get, as i just remembered that this time of my life coincided with my dad's insane religious phase where he wouldn't let me buy californication, also didn't want us to watch buffy the vampire slayer because of the demons, and also i found out years later used to sprinkle holy water and scatter miraculous medals in our room out of concern for our souls and to make us wanna go to church

Sarah: pls write a book about that now k thnx

The Financial District continues to be lame

Fiona: i just got an "angry broker" wrap for lunch. only thing i like about financial district is its specific sandwich names
Alanty: HAHAHA what's in it, a big fat head and ugly haircut?

Life is good

Fiona: fyi i just misread a sheet that says "What If I...?" above "Manager's Central" as "MILF Central"
Sarah: name of my house in 15 years
Fiona: lol kneeslapper
Sarah: northeastern hunky monster conference for MILFs


Fiona: ps just was looking through a file and was like, hey this filing is really neat and nicely done, LOL IT WAS ME
Alanty: hahahaha props to yourselfffff
Ninty: AHAHA AWESOME

Starting the new year off with just the right combination of despair and smugness

Fiona: fyi last night when i was talking to him an extremely drunk girl who was essentially my polar opposite came up to him and interrupted our convo with "you can wet my reed any day" and then asked for a kiss, and they kissed, and she went away and he was like "that is why people are in bands" and then 2 minutes later the drunk girl was on a table trying to take a decoration off the wall and the table tipped and she almost fell and a glass broke and she got yelled at by the bartender who was like "GOODNIGHT MISS WE'RE NOT SERVING YOU ANYMORE." lolsob for the record books.
Sarah: oh my god. are you living in a move? are we on TV?? TRUMAN, I MADE MACARONI

Now you don't have to read any erotic Twilight fanfic because this is exactly what it's like

Fiona: i just came across "pebbled" [nipples] in this fanfic. i'm so mad
Sarah: omg srsly??? what's WRONG WITH THEM
Fiona: they need to stop stealing from each other! at least be stupid in original ways
Fiona: just found a fic where bella's size 14 and edward loves her anyway. LOL LOL LOL SO UNREALISTIC
Sarah: i wish we had twilight audio books for the subway
Sarah: HAHAHHAHAHA NO OMG. SEND IT TO ME
Fiona: hahahaha i wish! there would be lolling all over the B/Q. also i only just found it and am on chapter one but it's rated M. FAT SEX
Sarah: bella, your thighs may be the size of christmas hams but they ARE my life now
Fiona: LOL GOING ON THE BLOG
Sarah: quick come up with a line that incorporates dust motes and stretch marks.
Fiona: I GAZED AT THE DUST MOTES FLOATING IN THE AFTERNOON SUNLIGHT AS IT STRUCK THE SPARKLING SKIN ON EDWARD'S HAND AS IT LOVINGLY CARESSED MY STRETCHMARKS
Fiona: HE TOOK ME BY THE HAND AND SAID "COME, I WANT TO TASTE YOU." MY NIPPLES PEBBLED AT THE THOUGHT AND MY HANDS FISTED IN HIS HAIR. HE GROANED AND SAID "YOU'LL BE THE DEATH OF ME"
Sarah: ...AND THIS WHOLE TIME I WAS FAT!

Oh god, the frenzy is getting worse

Sarah: "shall i rephrase? breakfast time for the human"


Sarah: "AND THEN I CAREFULLY SEALED AWAY MY HEART"
Sarah: p.s. i'm getting choked up. i hate myself.
Fiona: at least in all my insanity, that never happened to me.
Sarah: eff u
Fiona: "eff u," said sarah to the autistic robot


Sarah: dude why on earth do they get on a PLANE??? don't they have super human speed????
Fiona: it's faster than running. alice says so. p.s. kill me


Sarah: lesson of the day: reading a 550 page book called Rape on the subway is more awkward than reading twilight on the subway


Fiona: p.s. i've decided to preface everything i do with "(blank) time for the human"
Sarah: hahaha i was thinking the same thing
Sarah: sleep time for the human!


Sarah: AHHHHHHHHH LIFE
Sarah: question: are the voices she hears in new moon actually edward or just her imagining what edward would say, i can't tell cause none of it makes sense anyway
Fiona: she's imagining it. did you get to the end yet? she gives some bullshit explanation at the end that's supposed to be like oh she's not crazy but it makes no fucking sense.
Sarah: no i'm only on page 115
Sarah: question: wy doesn't bella just find another vamp to turn her?
Fiona: because of the frenzy that starts when they drink blood. although there are ton of newborns in eclipse. not surprisingly this discrepancy is never addressed. ps kill me.


Melissa: "the large hands fitting providentially into a deep dent in the side of the van's body"?!?! Really?!?! oh boy, haha.
Fiona: hahaha oh my god are you reading it???
Melissa: Yeeeees. i borrowed from a woman on my floor. i go all curious and it really might kill me like a cat. So. Bad. You were not exaggerating!
Melissa: i shake my fist at you stephanie meyers! as i find myself reading voraciously to find the plot
Fiona: hahaha i'm putting that on my blog
Fiona: also settle in for a long ride before plot shows up, late to the party and drunk as usual
Melissa: Yes, fame! I was actually thinking about crcking open wine to read with: if the plot is going to show up wasted, i can meet it tipsy.
Fiona: breaking dawn, page 55: first appearance of the word "manfully" in this history of the english language. STEPHENIE MEYER YOU ARE A DONKEY
Melissa: Hahaha i guess she used the thesaurus so hard it broke and she was stuck making up her own backward-ass (donkey that is) words. Oh i crack myself up.
Fiona: hahah absotively
Fiona: srsly it's like a madlibs thing. bella admired edward's (adjective), (adjective) (body part) and (verb, past-tense) at his (type of rock)-like (body part).
Fiona: hmmm. that particular sentence could be really dirty if not careful. speaking of, there are so many moments where i'm like WHY AREN'T THEY DOING IT
Melissa: Haha it felt totally dirty and i was thinking to myself "hmmm do they get all nekkid?" right now it's more angsty than sexy. -we can't have teens across the usa thinking it's okay to have premarital sex! even if he says he's a vampire
Fiona: hahaha stupid mormon author. there's a part in eclipse when they talk about which commandments they've broken, and then edward is totally gonna do it with her, but then bella decides she wants to wait for marriage too, and i was like FFFFFFFUUUUUCCCCKKKK
Melissa: Hahaha i guess that's why all hat fanfiction sprouted up. Some frustrated readers don't stand for that. No doesn't always mean no, someimes it means YES!
Fiona: haha thank god for people on the internet who are shameless desperate weirdos and make me seem less insane
Melissa: Ahh i think that almost everyday of my life. Thanks universe and technology, now i know for sure i am more sane and balanced than a lot of other people!


Fiona: "the two brazilians looked incredibly short and dark next to him." RACIST
Sarah: hahahahahahaha


Fiona: jacob's perspective, page 1: "life sucks, and then you die. yeah, i should be so lucky." DAZZLING WORDPLAY, SPARKLING EVEN


Fiona: fyi breaking dawn has a refreshing amount of plot


Fiona; breaking dawn reveals that while humans have 23 chromosomal pairs, vamps have 25. SCIENCE FAIL
Ninty: THAT'S FUCKING RETARDED.

Fiona: "it was a place where anyone could believe magic existed. a place where you just expected snow white to walk right in with her apple in hand, or a unicorn to stop and nibble at the rosebushes." OMG SERIOUSLY ARE YOU SERIOUS
Fiona: "IF I HADN'T SEEN HIM UNDRESSED I WOULD HAVE SWORN THERE WAS NOTHING MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN EDWARD IN HIS KHAKITS AND PALE BEIGE PULLOVER"
Sarah: er.....i love you but you're waking me up girl
Fiona: oh sorry, will stop [CHAGRIN]

The nightmare is true, those are real quotations

Sarah: i can't believe the way she has bella describe herself
Sarah: I CAN'T READ THIS WITHOUT GRINNING THE WHOLE TIME I LOOK LIKE A CREEP
Fiona: i know! i was just thinking that to myself as i examined my ivory skin
Fiona: ps i'm sorry i ruined your life
Sarah: i'm alienating everyone. surprise!
Fiona: are you at a party?
Sarah: there's like 5 other people
Fiona: so you're in the corner reading Twilight and occasionally interrupting with "that's offensive to sex workers"?
Sarah: basically
Sarah: can we brunch?
Fiona: yes ma'am
Sarah: "the wasting of finite resources is everyone's business"


Fiona: gaaaah EMMETT THAT'S NOT A WORD. TAKE IT OFF THE BOARD.


Fiona: "jasper's been thinking about cheating -- adverse as he is to the idea"
adverse
Adverse
ADVERSE
Fiona: this series is teaching me that a woman isn't whole unless there's marriage and babies
Fiona: ugggggghhh edward and bella are discussing which commandments they've broken when they should be fucking
Fiona: the internet's not working. i only have 50 pages of eclipse left. it's going to be a really long week.
Sarah: oh NO
Fiona: "who's definition of right?" I AM DYING
Fiona: "I AM IN YOUR DEBT ROCK GODS OF MUSE FOR YET ANOTHER INSPIRING ALBUM"
Sarah: "i may not be human but i am a man." Wtf????

Fiona: number of times Bella says "holy crow!" in first three books: at least 5

it's just more shame.

Fiona: i bought the first 3, the last one was only in hardcover. apparently there is a line i won't cross.
Fiona: oh fyi twilight's epigraph is from the bible
Sarah: i just saw the new moon preview and kind of squealed. sarah looked at me funny
Fiona: oh yeah, cause you're the weird one
Fiona: up to page 45 - number of times that bella mentions that she's already studied what her class is covering: 3. "dazzling" used once. also "greenly"
Sarah: as in "the grass reflected greenly in his dazzling sparkling skin"?
Fiona: not exactly but it sounds like you've got her style down already
Fiona: "his gaze became appraising." YOU DONKEY. fyi i will stop texting you about this i swear
Sarah: hahahahahha
Sarah: p.s. tell me you've seen the VF pic of rpattz eating corn
Fiona: i have. amaaaazing. those pics are...really attractive. i like the black and white one. but the corn one is best concept-wise, obvs
Sarah: "now rob, move the corn a little to the left...no your other left.. ok ok now butter the corn, butter the corn, rob...there ya go."
Fiona: hahaha um new thing to yell in bed?
Fiona: BUTTER THE CORN ROB
Sarah: LOL-ING ALL OVER THE PLACE
Fiona: "no...leave the bib on"

Fiona: "'aren't you hungry?' he asked, distracted. 'no.' i didn't feel like mentioning that my stomach was already full-- of butterflies."
Sarah: OH MY GOD. could you please write a novel already?
Fiona: yeah i guess someone's gotta be a counterbalance for this

Fiona: sorry i know it's late but very important: "dust moats" instead of "dust motes"
Sarah: wtf is a dust mote?
Fiona: bits of dust. like when you're in a sunny room you can see them floating around. it's very common. you can google it.
Sarah: i hate you go to bed

Sweet merciful jesus why

Fiona: fyi can't stop listening to neko case album you gave me. so good holy crap.
Sarah: iknowrite???mm?hywkywqhegw2 SO TIRED
Fiona: oh noooo. sorry i busted in kramer-style last night and dropped my keys in the echo chamber, forgot you'd be on couch.
Sarah: trust me you're the least of my problems
Fiona: that's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me
Sarah: <3
Sarah: the fake rpattz and kstew relationship is fake over btw
Fiona: now's our chance to swoop in and scoop him up, if the pattinson pants lady or nutty madam hasn't gotten to him already

some time later

Fiona: ps james sent me rpattz cross stitch pattern from gawker. he knows me too well.

This week in erotic Twilight fanfic

Sarah: have been working all day for once. am now done and bored with an hour to go. just googled twilight fan fiction. sigh.
Fiona: hah i'm jealous. i'm not feeling well, came in at 1 to craziness, trying to weigh letting stuff sit around an extra day which really shouldn't or stay late
Sara: oh no SWINE FLU?
Fiona: prob not. maybe a cold? i hope!
Sarah: um. this stuff is making me FEEL WEIRD
Fiona: is it stirring strange desires and longings? FOR UNDYING LOVE? AND ROMANCE?
Sara: mostly for ice cold vampire sex

It is actsh way more boring than thatt

Alanty: LOTUS NOTES. i don't even know what that is, but i have heard of it and it makes me think of a buddha's published ruminations on meditation